I had that moment last night after choir practice.
To start off I should mention that a couple of months ago a guy from church was having a conversation with me. During that conversatition he told me I'm going to have an impact on people and do great things in this world - that I'm going to be like another Fr. Dan.
Then a few nights ago I had a dream that my grandma was in.
In the dream my mom was in it and there were people in the background (not sure if they were members of my family but maybe). The setting of my dream was sort of like at a viewing where a picture board is set up with the person who passed away. My mom happened to point out a picture of me on my Grandma's lap.
She also pointed out that it was the only picture of her and a grandchild up there. Then my mom walked out of the room and my grandma appeared (as she looked before she was sick and in the hospital) and had something important to tell me. She said, "A grandmother knows her grandchildren the instant they are born. She made sure to emphasize the word "knows". Then she said "You are destined to do many great things." And my dream was over.
I got up the next morning and happened to look in all my alubms because the picture looked familiar. I found it in the last one I flipped thru:
I was talking to one of the women in choir and asked her if she thinks dreams have meanings and she said yes that some do but it's up to you to figure out which ones do and what the meaning is.
Well when I got in my car to leave after practice I had the radio on to 96.9 pulse fm and the song that was playing was a new one to me but the first line in it was Sometimes Your calling comes in dream. The rest of the song tied in with everything too but when I heard that first line I felt God was speaking to me.
After that song I heard this song (only the Rebecca St James version). When my grandma was in the hospital I played this song for her (it was on my phone). She looked so relaxed and calm even though she was hooked up to different machines. All we could hear was the "drip, drip" of the liquid that was in these bags (i have no idea what it was for) and it sort of sounded like the holy water font at St. Pius.
After hearing both those songs in a row I just completely lost it and had a panic attack. At first I just started yelling as if I were in pain and mad at something and then I completely broke down and cried - that lasted for an hour (and yes I just sat in my car at the church parking lot). I finally called my mom's cousin, Penny, which extremely helped! She talked me thru it and prayed over the phone (Thanks again!).
--> I know I'm gonna need to get it out again because the one year anniversary is coming up soon.
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